The first 3 conversations to have when you are promoted to management over your peers
When I was in my early twenties, I was promoted to be the manager of a department that was adjacent to the one I worked in. I knew all of the employees by name as there were only eight of them, and they knew me, but we had never directly worked together, and I didn’t know their personalities or their personal stories at all.
I felt the most important thing for me to do was to have a one-to-one conversation with each person to get to know them better and for them to know me – and my perspective on being a “boss” - better as well.
This was purely a “gut” instinct as I had no mentor to usher me in to my new role or to ask questions of (in fact, I’m not sure my promotion was based on merit as much as it was based on the fact that I was the assistant manager of the adjacent department, so I at least had some management experience and was a known entity to senior leadership).
To make things a little more difficult, in my “promotion conversation” with the general manager of the company I was told that my first order of business was to cut one full time worker because the company had hit a financial hiccup and needed to conserve money. Great.
Why am I sharing this?
Because a lot of young, inexperienced people are being promoted to management positions over their peers these days, thanks to the great resignation, and I want to help them make the transition as smooth as possible. I cannot help with functional responsibilities – like how to do payroll or order supplies - but I can help with the people-management side of things.
So, in my opinion, here are the first three conversations a newly appointment manager should have with their new team:
Conversation #1
Have a private, one-to-one meeting with each person. Ask them about their life (family, pets, free time preferences), what they like or dislike about the job (you might be able to fix that), and one thing they think should change about their role or the department in general (since the company I am referencing was a 16/7 business rolling start times was a common request from my new team).
This first conversation should be all about them. Help them to trust you by listening to their concerns, preferences, and expectations.
I feel strongly that at the end of this conversation you should emphasize that while they may see you as a peer (which you were, like, yesterday) you now have an allegiance to management and while you will take their concerns and preferences into consideration when possible, you also will be making decisions based on what is best for the organization as a whole.
Conversation #2
The second conversation should be done with the whole team. In this conversation you’ll express your work and communication preferences. You don’t want to have this conversation over and over during the 1:1 conversations and you want to ensure that everyone hears the same message and asks any clarifying questions in front of everyone else.
Work preferences
You might share your working hour preferences – such as, I won’t answer your emails or texts between 5p and 8:30p as that is my “family time.” (Or, don’t contact me after hours at all, because I won’t reply and I promise I will treat you with the same respect.) Or, I like to get caught up on Sundays so don’t panic when you see 3 or 4 emails in your inbox on Monday morning, it doesn’t indicate they are urgent, it just indicates I was working on Sunday, which is my preference because it’s quiet.
Communication preferences
Be sure to share how you do and don’t prefer to be communicated with, for instance, my preferences are:
An email if not urgent
“Ping” me (in Slack, Teams, etc.) if you want to see if I am free in the next few minutes to an hour (in other words: Is it OK to interrupt me?)
A phone call if you need an answer now
Again, personally, I would share that texting is not something I respond to as I rarely have my cell phone with me at my desk and I’m pretty much always sitting at my desk – so you can easily “find me there.”
During this conversation leave plenty of time for them to ask questions OF you. They may want to know if they have to ask permission if they are going to come in late or leave early for a “personal reason,” or they may share that a certain number of customers ask for preferential treatment and the last manager didn’t expect to be apprised of that unless it went over a certain dollar amount… so what is your “rule” on the subject?
Conversation #3
The final conversation can be done 1:1 or in the group forum, it really depends on the type of work that your employees do – if everyone does a different job, it’s more logical to have a 1:1 conversation. Since you are making a transition from peer/worker to management, your employees know that you know how to do the work, and therefore might have expectations regarding how much you will help them.
This is a tough “line of demarcation” for many new managers (heck! many experienced managers as well) because those who like to “do” often find themselves getting pulled in to “doing,” when they really should be overseeing and guiding. So in this conversation, you’ll want to be clear about what you are willing to assist with and what you will do.
For example, Jules spent many years as an integrator at a B2B financial services firm. Her job was to onboard new businesses and help them transfer their 401k management to her firm. When she took over the department there were times when one of her new employees/former peers would ask her with help when they ran into a snafu, and she would find herself sitting down in their chair and fixing the problem while the employee stood by and watched. After a few months she realized that she would end up being a manager and a troubleshooter if she didn’t change her ways and show her employees how to find their own solutions.
Before you have this conversation with your team, think clearly about what your new responsibilities are vs. what their responsibilities are and what level of “answer person” you are willing to be. Jules could have said to her team, “As an integrator myself, I am happy to help you troubleshoot BUT I also want you to be self-sufficient, so if you need my help, be aware that my involvement will be that of a coach or teacher. I’ll help you to figure it out, but I won’t solve the problem for you because I want you to be capable of fixing it again in the future.”
Transitioning from peer to manager is not easy because there are expectations on all fronts; but a lot of potential problems can be eliminated by taking the time to be open and upfront with your new employees regarding what your new role requires of you and how you will interact with them. Good luck!